A Crash Course in Plain Legal Language

By Cheryl Stephens

There are three common problems in writing style for writers of legal discourse:

Overuse of nominalizations
Overuse of passive verbs
Focus on exceptions and negatives rather than on basic principles.

When a verb is converted to a noun it has been "nominalized". A nominalization of a verb can be used as a subject, object, or whatever else a noun is used for. The problem is the vibrant actions are converted to wooden nouns - an olympic gymnast becomes a stick man. This makes legal prose heavy and unclear. Here are some examples:

If they had made a decision...<---> If they had decided...
The Court, in its ruling, held that...<---> The Court ruled...

Passive verbs take the opposite tack to active verbs. With active verbs, the subject of the sentence is the actor or doer. With passive verbs, the thing done becomes the subject of the sentence and has something done to it. Here are two sentences, one passive, one active:

The lawyer was punished by the Benchers by suspension. <---> The Benchers suspended the lawyer.

In The Transitive Vampire, Karen Gordon comments on the use of passive voice constructions:

"Take it easy on the passive voice. It's too tired to be overused.

ACTIVE: The Grandee bullied the bum.
PASSIVE: The bum was bullied by the grandee.

ACTIVE: The nymphs dished it out.
PASSIVE: It was dished out by the nymphs.

When the person who did it or does it (whatever it is or was) is unknown or unimportant to the sense of the sentence, you may avail yourself of the passive voice.

The faux pas was ignored for several days.
Her crimes have been absolved.
The grub was grudgingly passed around.
The roadhouse was ransacked in the middle of the moonless night."

Another legal habit is putting the things that negate or form exceptions or limitations to the front of the sentence or paragraph. The main point - the basic principle - is relegated to the back of the line. This is the opposite of how people think and it makes comprehension difficult. Make your reader comfortable by driving your point home first. Also avoid putting things negatively. Restate in a positive construction.

We didn't do more than this. <---> We did this.

There are many published lists of maxims for how to write better, simpler and more clearly. Pick the one you like best and post it above your work space.